Sacrifice...

I had a bit of an internal drama over the last few days that can be traced back to what might be a bit of sinful pride.

I was contemplating life in general, and I thought that I had finally come to a place where I could answer Jesus "yes" to the command he posed to the rich young ruler. That is, "sell all you own, and give it to the poor." But then it hit me. There is one thing that would be really hard for me to give up, if I could at all: my music.

I don't want to talk about why it is so important, I just talked to someone the other night who said their music wasn't very important to them, but he had something else. So for me, its my music.

I wrestled with this for quite a few days. The practicality of if, the motivation behind it, etc. etc. Last week I took a day just for me and God, and this question came up again in a big way, so that I finally relinquished. I would give away all of my music, however I could. Wipe my computer clean, delete everything off my ipod, etc.

I started going through the practical side of it, and it being Saturday, I remembered that pawn shops were commonly closed on Sunday, so I commited aloud: "okay Lord, I will bring them to the pawn shop on Monday." Knowing some of my tendencies, I next exclaimed, "Lord, I'm not going to go back and forth on this, my mind is made up, and if there is some reason why I should not do this, you will have to stop me somehow."

Almost immediately after I said this I realized that the promised Monday fell on a holiday. New Years Day to be exact. So immediately went into figuring out the next day I could bring them in, when God reminded me of my promise to bring them in Monday. All of a sudden the issue of giving away my music became the issue of "letting your 'Yes' be 'Yes' and your 'No' be 'No'".

I could not deny that my prayer had been answered, God had stopped me. There were other things that happened that day that confirmed it further, but I kept myself open to the slim possibility that the pawn shop may be open on Monday. (Maybe they cash in on New Years resolution sales! Who knows?!)

Stay with me the point is coming....

So on Monday I packed up all my CD's, and headed for the pawn shop and of course, it was closed. As I rode away, I felt a bit of praise rising up in my that is explainable in a sense, I got to keep my CD's, right? but it was something different, it was something real.

It is simply this:

Why would God stop me from giving away my music?
Could it have been a good thing? Of course!
Even if it was a bit misguided, could it have been used for good? Yes!

I must conclude that God never asks us for anything unless it is Good for us. He doesn't even want me to go through the insignificant amount of pain that would be involved in giving up my music.

So when something hurts, or you think God is asking too much of you, just remember that He would not ask if it was not absolutely necessary for YOUR benefit. That's all.