Sunday, September 10, 2006

So Much...

As in, there is so much I learned this summer, I'm reluctant to even write anything! But I'll start with this...

So a few years ago I had a good friendship with a girl that I was strongly attracted to. I eventually told her of my feelings and found, to my dissapointment, that they were not reciprocated. I then went through a very painful process of continuing to spend time with her. I told myself that if I ever again was in a situation where I had feelings for a girl, and she didn't, that I would simply discontinue the relationship.

Fast forward to this summer, and we have the same story all over again. Though as I listened to God, I felt very strongly that I needed to continue this new relationship, despite the pain that could, and that already has resulted from it. I didn't know why. At first I thought that it was simply because discontinuing the relationship would just be selfish, as it would be simply to save my own feelings. Then God revealed to me a better reason: to learn about His character.

I have never understood this about God before as well as I do now.

God is untouchable. Invincible. Unvulnerable.

But here is the thing. He makes Himself vulnerable. Think about it. When God loves us, he takes a risk. Even worse, He knows the result in many cases. He knows that He will sometimes offer his heart, only to have it ripped in two by us. Have you ever loved somebody who doesn't love you back? Then you have a vague understanding of God's feelings. It hurts alot.

If you could choose to not love somebody, who you knew would hurt you, would you love them anyway? Not likely. but God does. I cannot overemphasize this.

As Christians we talk alot about God giving up His son and the love that shows, and I don't mean to devalue that. But we close our eyes to the fact that God suffers everyday from our rejection. But there is an amazing side to this to...

It brings God so much joy when we return His love. Imagine that person that you loved, who never loved you, one day coming up to you and hugging you and saying, "I'm sorry, I really do love you." Would it not bring tears to your eyes?

I believe those tears are in the eyes of God as well. And for some reason, it makes all the hurt worth it for Him.